Hope in the Storm

Oh the weather has been incredible lately.  Thunder showers followed by breath-taking rainbows...and even double rainbows (what does it mean LOL)?  These beautiful rainbows in the sky always remind me of hope.  Such gorgeous colours spring forth only after the dark thunderous clouds and rain finally relent to the glorious light of the sun.  I have been chatting with a few of my dear friends who have found themselves in such dark, stormy places they never thought they would be in.  Each circumstance differs greatly from the next, yet a common thread of sorrow, pain and grief unilaterally abounds.  When we find ourselves in the thick of such pain, entrenched in thorns and suffocating in vines of sorrow, we long for reprieve.  When watching a loved one in such a place of suffering we long to help.  Yet, too often a well-meaning individual will try to stick on a platitude to somehow bind up the unwrappable feelings of grief and loss.  A friend of mine shared an intersting article with me today on 'Vulnerablity and Christianese' (http://rachelheldevans.com/blog/christianese-vulnerability ) and how these petty little blanket statements such as "God will not give you more than you can handle" infuriate an already stressed out soul.  Although most of these trite comments do come from a place of good intention, what a wounded soul needs is simply the raw, honest truth with a snippet of hope.  I know it sounds crazy, but too much 'happy' talk ie. "all things will work together for good" can, at times, diminish one's current pain.  For example, I know that Gracie is 'in a better place,' but sometimes that just makes me feel guilty for wishing that place was here.  When someone is given the ground-shattering news such as ' the cancer has returned' or that there is 'nothing more than can be done', we must be quick to hold our tongues and extend a loving hand.  There is an unbelievable urge for us to 'fix' things, but there are some things that just can't be fixed.  There are times in this life that just don't make sense and sometimes...life is just simply unfair.

During our season of Grace, many friends were there for us, some respectfully gave us space, and others were bold enough to ask what they could do or say to help.  As life continues to trickle on as quickly as the proverbial sand through the hour glass, friends continue to ask me, "what do I say to someone whose world has just crumbled beneath them?"  If you are in this place today, whether you are the one in the valley or whether your heart is breaking for a loved one who is, here is a quote that I have found helpful and that I love.  I hope it helps shine a light in the midst of the valley, if not for you, then for someone near you who is in the fight of his/her life.

WANTED: A GRIEF HELPER

Father Joe Mahoney

A strong, deep person, wise enough to allow me to grieve in the depth of who I am, and strong enough to hear my pain without turning away.

Not too close, because then you couldn't help me to see. Not too objective, because then you might not care. Not too aloof, because then you couldn't hug me. Not too caring, because then I'd be tempted to let you live my life for me.

I need someone who believes that the sun will rise again, but who does not fear my darkness, or my walk through the night;

Someone who can point out the rocks in my way without making me a child by carrying me;

Someone who can stand in thunder and watch the lightning, and believe in a rainbow.